Poor Man About Town

I love to hate these programmes. Simpering Simon Davis goes to a house that looks like a cross between the interior the Starship Enterprise (the Next Generation) cum modern hamster cage, the sort with clear coloured plastic tube type walkways etc. Simon Davis was awash with all the crap words - "mezzanine bedroom" - what the fuck is that? A place where visitors can buy ice creams, ki-ora and pop corn from the occupant to consume while watching the telly. The living room had a fucking swimming pool in it. The lady of the house kept on calling Simon Davis "Sweetie". The house was supposedly carbon friendly - computer controlled - "a house with a brain as well as a conscience". The computer would pink and blue out the place that it started to look like a lap dance club. Gosh! Then the family had supper - nightclub jazz, what is it about jazz, this noble art form attracting so many pretentious turds - I guess it's the pose potential. I could see no black people at this supper so the next best thing would do - Yep JAZZ! I'm sophisticated, I've got JAZZ! A mere style accesory. A CD with a photo of a black guy nonchantally placed on the coffee table makes a good surrogate for having real token black people to supper! One can avoid all that embarr.assment



How can anyone live in a house like that.

And if you want to sick up even further, here's the bbc blurb for the programme:

Shoe-horned into a Victorian mews on the site of an old car workshop the house is almost invisible from the street. Inside, it's as if Simon has gone to high tech heaven. A swimming pool in the living room, lighting and heating all controlled by a central computer and a serious attempt at greener living are all on display along with an enormous sliding glass roof which brings football stadium technology into a family home

Labels: Lifestyle